Chain of Command

Have you ever gotten mad at someone at work and instead of going to that person or their immediate supervisor, you went straight to the top because you didn't think anything would be done if you didn't do otherwise? I have totally been there. And truthfully in my experience while I may feel very upset about it, it doesn't really matter that I went to the top. In fact, in my line of work you can be reprimanded for going around the chain of command.

I am beginning to realize that there is a chain of command for God too. Not that I can't go to God with my problems, worries and concerns, but that I can't be the husband/father and wife/mother. I am a wife and a mother. I am a daughter of God. I am not a man. I am not the father or husband. It sounds so self-explanatory.  Today's modern society has taught me that I can be both. I can be the bread-winner and home-maker. I even tried that and I failed. How can one person be all those people? Either work or family or home or person is going to be ignored so the others can succeed. 

I watched a PBS documentary on the women's rights movement last week and at first I couldn't understand why there were women rallying against equal rights for women, then I thought about it and it clicked. They were scared, scared we would have too much responsibility placed on us, worried that the military draft would apply to us, concerned that we would forget our place in God's chain of command. Understandably so, we have lost sight of our purpose and calling. It is to support and trust and love our husbands. Its to willingly sacrifice (instead of submit) ourselves to them because we love them, and we want them to be the best they can be so that we can be the best we can be.

Ephesians 5
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Now, I can feel your blood pressure rising. I am not saying that at times we aren't called to take over some of the roles. I am not saying that its impossible. I am saying that women don't deserve equal pay, that we can't be successful business women. I am saying that God's plan for us is laid out in the Bible. Sometimes that plan can include being a successful business women. Sometimes that plan has to include being a single mother who plays all roles. But with all the success we are still to be there for our husbands. (Now the husbands need to be where their purpose lies also, but that's a whole other conversation)

There is a chain of command for a reason. Its purpose is to make sure that our men fulfill their purpose and that we fulfill ours. Our role is imperative to the husbands. They need us and that is why God created us.

It may sound like I am trying to convince you of this personal revelation, but I am actually still convincing myself. I want to take control. I want to be the one making the decisions. I am having to remind myself that doing that is not my purpose. I heard one pastor say that the struggle I have is actually one of the things talked about in the fall of Eden. Because of our sin we won't be satisfied. Just one more way for the devil to weasel his way into our lives.

I have even heard this message preached to me before on more that one occasion. Then my marriage is suffering, my children are suffering, I am suffering, and I wonder why. I have come to realize that one reason may be that I was not following the chain of command. Of course there are times when we have to step up or question our husbands decision. Been there. Done that. But what if their wrong decision was to bring your family to another chapter in life. Maybe not one you would have chosen but we don't get to pick the will of God. What if it was supposed to be that way? whoa.